This was one of my sling diary entries for Sakurabloom and today is the perfect day to re-share it.
“A little too big to be a baby, but still very young. With her chestnut hair coming down her face she lays her head on my chest, close to my heart. I realize that I am in that moment. That moment where I am loving her with the exact love I once craved. That same love I hoped for and imagined feeling. It’s painful to continue writing this and not mention the letters of her name, but love heals. My love for my daughter healed me. It made me whole again. This mother-daughter relationship is what I had been waiting for my entire life. You see, this bond I have with Mila is powerful, and our connection will be one of her most imprinting childhood experiences. I want her to know that I will be patient with her. I will be kind. I will never grow angry with her. I will always listen and understand her. I will protect her and be there for her, but most importantly, I will love her hard! Unconditionally and no matter what. She will feel and know my love because my affection will be lavish, from the moment she wakes up until she goes to bed at night. Even through disciplinary actions I will reaffirm my love for her. I won’t make the mistake of leaving her with a moment of doubt about my love. The years will pass, and our bond will continue to bloom. I will be the first person she cries to and the first person that hears her great news. These will be new experiences for me, and I can not tell you how I long for this. Our relationship will also come with challenges, but I am certain we will overcome them. After all, she was handcrafted for me. But don’t worry my Mila Rose, I will say “I am sorry” when I need to. I’ve had a lot of healing over things that could’ve been easily smoothed with these simple swords, so I won’t take any chances with you. I know in the depths of my soul that I will raise you into a woman with encouragement and optimism. I will tailor to your needs and not try to mold you to fit in mine because you will never be my mini me. You will be your own. You will find your own interest and pursue your own dreams that have nothing to do with me, but I will be there to light up your path. I will do that and more, because I love you. There is nothing more important in life than love. Give your daughter(s) your love, show them, but most important tell them.”